8 Things from Dirty Dancing That'll Have to Be Changed for the Reboot

Dirty Dancing Reboot: Plot Elements That Will Have to be Changed/Updated
Jennifer Grey and Patrick Swayze in Dirty Dancing

03/02/2016 AT 02:30 PM EST

While we're excited about the Dirty Dancing reboot that's coming down the pike, there's no getting around the fact that the original is a little dated at this point. (Not the presence of Jerry Orbach, though. Jerry Orbach is eternal.)

So here are eight plot elements that they might want to alter for the reboot.

1. Make Baby 18.
Just do it, please. You can be 18 and still vacation with your family. It's weird enough that everyone calls her "Baby" (her character's real name was Frances), and the whole creepy aspect of her being underage (17) really hasn't aged well for us.

2. Johnny could call AAA and get that car unlocked.
Or, like, use a coat hanger. My dad can do that, but Johnny's just gotta jump straight to smashing. Huh?

3. The waiter/dancer hierarchy has been slightly inverted since the '60s.
At this point, between Magic Mike and the Step Up series, it's kind of unlikely that anyone's going to prefer that their daughters hang out with a waiter instead of a dancer. Nobody ever won America's Got Talent for waiting tables, that's for sure.

4. Change the beige iridescent lipstick.
All wrong. Clearly Lisa should be looking for her liquid eyeliner or contouring brush or something in 2016.

5. Is wallet-thieving still a thing?
The criminal activity should be identity theft or a phishing scam or something. Old people stealing wallets just feels so … archaic. Like from the Middle Ages.

6. What is a 'bungalow bunny' even in 2016?
Older women can get it. Without paying for it. This is 2016. Come on.

7. The whole 'secret' abortion thing doesn't really fly in 2016.
While we are in no way minimizing the experience of having an abortion, the national attitude toward them has shifted somewhat since 1963.

8. Smartphones.
Smartphones just kind of ruin every movie pre-smartphone. There's no way Baby could spend as much of this film hiding from her parents in a smartphone world. Also it would be impossible for the dancers to pull in audience members near the end, because everyone would just have their phone out. And someone's aunt would have her iPad.
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