In a hilarious new skit with Stephen Colbert, the "Full House daddies" (John Stamos, Bob Saget and Dave Coulier) team up with the late-night host to reimagine the hit '90s sitcom as a gritty cop drama, Full House Nights.
As Coulier, 56, explains, the men "play adult roommate detectives who've seen a little too much."
"The basic premise is that after the Tanner kids go to sleep, the Full House daddies, we go out and we go to the mean streets of San Francisco and we solve crimes," says Stamos, 52.
"It's scum of the earth stuff, stuff people love: drugs, sex, murder – murder, sex," Saget, 59, chimes in.
Meanwhile, Colbert, 51, plays Demetri, a Russian gangster.
Already from the revamped credits, it's obvious Full House Nights is a far departure from the cheery '90s sitcom: The title sequence is shadowy and grim, with an ominous version of the "Everywhere You Look" theme song playing in the background as black-and-white shots of the actors fade across the screen. (Oh and, lest we forget, we're reminded that Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen don't star in this reboot, either.)
The clip (which contains NSFW language) opens with Demetri being detained at a police station by the three men, and Danny (Saget) and Uncle Jesse (Stamos) start questioning him with a classic good cop/bad cop routine.
"Cut the crap, Demetri. Where is the next shipment coming in?" Jesse demands.
"I don't know what you're talking about, strangely young-looking man!" Demetri responds.
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When that fails, they turn to Uncle Joey (Coulier) and his cartoon impressions.
As Joey rattles off lines as Bullwinkle, Pop-Eye and Scooby Doo (interrupted only by Jesse, who promises they "won't have mercy"), Demetri eventually cracks.
Danny then sits down to comfort the criminal: "Listen, champ. Everybody has pain. And everybody wants to bury that pain under piles and piles of blow," he says, as the camera pans to Jesse, who chimes in, "Damn right." (Stamos, meanwhile, has been open about his own struggles with substance abuse in the past.)
Eventually, the Full House daddies convince Demetri to give up his harsh lifestyle and move in with them – watch the clip to find out how that turns out.
Fuller House is streaming on Netflix, and The Late Show with Stephen Colbert airs weekdays at 11:35 p.m. ET on CBS.