The singer, who confirmed his engagement to Princess Love in January, stars in the new WE tv dating show Driven to Love, in which he drives contestants around New York as they pick up (or drop off) potential dates in an SUV.
In an exclusive clip from Friday's episode, Ray J encourages a contestant to go through one of the dates' phones – and they make a startling discovery when they find out that she has a racy picture of an (ex?) boyfriend, who happens to be a Chippendales dancer.
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But Ray J says he's focused on the positive now, and wants to impart some of what he's learned to the contestants on the show.
"The woman is always the boss. That's what're learned and now I'm having a great relationship," he says with a laugh. "I am engaged now so I am focused on bigger things and being a one-woman man. I think it's good now that I'm in more of a positive space. If I wasn't engaged and I was the old Ray J, I'd probably be trying to hook myself up with the woman in the back of the love taxi."
Ray J says he advises contestants to compromise on their expectations for a potential love match.
"You might be looking for a guy with a six pack that's 6'9 and is a lawyer that has money. You're not going to get everything. Some times you have to compromise," he says. "Maybe he's 6'2, has a four pack and is a future lawyer."
As for wedding planning, he says he's "taking it one day at a time."
"I'm letting her handle it," says Ray J. "I need to figure out what's really what with the planning. Do we hire people? Do we do it ourselves? Maybe we need to find a wedding planner. Listen, I've never done this before. I've only seen it in the movies."
Driven to Love airs Fridays (10 p.m. ET) on WE tv.