AUG. '80: CHARLES TAKES NEW NOTE OF GIRL-NEXT-DOOR LADY DIANA SPENCER AS SHE IMPISHLY DUMPS HIM OFF HIS SAILBOARD NEAR ISLE OF WIGHT.

SEPT. '80: CHARLES AND DI FISH AT QUEEN MUM'S FAVE SALMON SPOT ON SCOTTISH RIVER DEE. INTREPID TREE-SHINNYING FLEET STREET PHOTOG GETS CATCH OF DAY.

JUNE '81: CURIOSITY AROUSED BY STAMP TO HONOR APPROACHING NUPTIALS. CHARLES. ON BOX BESIDES 5'10" DI, APPEARS FOOT TALLER. IN FACT, SAME HEIGHT.

JULY '81: CHARLES AND DI SAY "I WILL" IN ST. PAUL'S CATHEDRAL IN PRICIEST ($1.1 MILL.) ROYAL WEDDING EVER. GLOBALLY 700 MILLION SIGH WITH Dl.

JUNE '82: DI GIVES BIRTH TO WILLIAM ARTHUR PHILIP LOUIS, 7 LBS., 1½ OZ., SECOND IN LINE TO THRONE.

JULY '82: INTRUDER MICHAEL FAGAN GETS INTO QEII'S CHAMBER, CHATS 10 MINUTES ON BED BEFORE CAUGHT.

SEPT. '82: COPTER PILOT HERO ANDREW RETURNS FROM 24 WEEKS DUTY IN FALKLAND ISLANDS CONFLICT. DESCRIBES ACTION AS "HORRIFIC."

OCT. '82: ANDREWS MUSTIQUE ROMP WITH EX-SOFT-PORN STAR KOO STARK CUT SHORT BY QUEEN AFTER TABLOIDS TELL ALL.

NOV. '82: QUEEN MUM HOSPITALIZED TWO NIGHTS, AFTER FISH BONE LODGES IN THROAT, REQUIRING SURGERY TO REMOVE.

MAY '84: CAUSTIC SPEECH CALLING PROPOSED ADDITION TO NATIONAL GALLERY "A MONSTROUS CARBUNCLE ON THE FACE OF A MUCH-LOVED AND ELEGANT FRIEND" PUTS CHARLES ON MAP AS HEATED CRITIC OF MODERN ARCHITECTURE.

SEPT. '84: DI GIVES BIRTH TO HENRY CHARLES ALBERT DAVID. 6 LBS., 14 OZ. QUIPS CHARLES: "WE'VE NEARLY GOT A FULL POLO TEAM NOW."

JAN. '85: PARTOF MARGARETS LEFT LUNG REMOVED AFTER SHE SUFFERS CHEST PAINS AND HARD BREATHING. NO CANCER FOUND. MONTHS LATER, RESUMES PACK-AND-A-HALF-A-DAY HABIT.

JULY '85: 40 STAFF REPORTED FIRED OR QUIT SINCE DI BECAME BOSS AT HER ROOST, KENSINGTON PALACE.

SEPT. '85: WILLS IS FIRST ROYAL HEIR TO ATTEND PRIVATE NURSERY SCHOOL.

NOV. '85: DI DANCES AT WHITE HOUSE WITH JOHN TRAVOLTA, NEIL DIAMOND AND CLINT EASTWOOD.

JULY '86: DI AND FERGIE DRESS UP AS BOBBIES, SWAGGER INTO ANDREW'S STAG PARTY AT ANNABEL'S, FLEE IN TITTERS WHEN RECOGNIZED.

JULY '86: ANDY WEDS FERGIE. SHE PROMISES "TO OBEY." FEMINISTS HISS.

JAN. '87: EDWARD RESIGNS ROYAL MARINES, BREAKING FAMILY TRADITION OF MILITARY SERVICE. HENCEFORTH NOT ALLOWED TO WEAR UNIFORM ON CEREMONIAL OCCASIONS.

AUTUMN '87: SAVE THE WALESES! ROYAL MARRIAGE REPORTED ON ROCKS AFTER LENGTHY SEPARATIONS AND SPOTTING OF DI DANCING WITH BANKER PHILIP DUNNE AND OTHERS.

NOV. '87: LIZ AND PHIL FOLLOW CUSTOM, TOAST THEIR ANNIVERSARY (40TH!) WITH CHAMPAGNE BEFORE LOG FIRE AT FRIENDS' MANOR.

MARCH '88: CHARLES'S CLOSE FRIEND MAJ. HUGH LINDSAY KILLED IN AVALANCHE AT KLOSTERS, IN SWITZERLAND, AFTER THE PRINCE AND HIS PARTY, IGNORING WARNINGS, SKI DOWN OFF-TRAIL SLOPE. CHARLES'S INTROSPECTION DEEPENS.

SPRING '88: CRITICISM CRESCENDOS OVER OSTENTATION, MODERNIST LOOK AND GREEN-ENCROACHING LOCATION OF SUNNINGHILL PARK, THE YORKS' NEW HOME.

APRIL '88: MAJ. RONALD FERGUSON, (FERGIE'S FATHER AND CHARLES'S POLO MANAGER) PHOTOGRAPHED LEAVING A LONDON MASSAGE PARLOR. "I'VE BEEN A FOOL," HE CONFESSES TO A FRIEND.

AUG. '88: FERGIE GIVES BIRTH TO BEATRICE ELIZABETH MARY, 6 LBS., 12 OZ.

AUG. '89: ANNE AND MARK PHILLIPS OFFICIALLY SPLIT AFTER 16 YEARS OF MARRIAGE AND TWO CHILDREN.

MARCH '90: FERGIE GIVES BIRTH TO EUGE NIE VICTORIA HELENA, 7 LBS., I½ OZ, BY CESAREAN SECTION.

MAY '90: PHILIP MAKES SPEECH SAYING BRITISH LIFE WOULD IMPROVE IF "WE ALL RESOLVED TO BE CLEAN, HONEST AND POLITE." BLASTED BY COLUMNIST JEAN ROOK AS "AN ILL-MANNERED GREEK IMMIGRANT...WHO'S BEEN WELL PAID...FOR DOING NOTHING..."

JUNE'90: CHARLES BREAKS RIGHT ARM IN SPILL FROM POLOPONY.

AUG. '90: TABS A-TWITTER: IN VENICE, DI AKES MOONLIT GONDOLA RIDE WITH HER LOCAL CHAUFFEUR. TONYPEZZO, 29, AND BESTOWS FAREWELL SMOOCH AT AIRPORT. LATER, CAVALRY MAJ. DAVID WATERHOUSE VISITS HER ALONE AT HIGHGROVE.

SEPT. '90: WILLIAM ENTERS LUDGROVE.