Creative Community Project is a large white Victorian house on Washington Street. I felt my stomach in my throat as I jabbed the doorbell. Before I could ring again, the door swung open. "Come on and join our circle," said a young man with a fixed smile. He offered his hand. I cautiously took it and sat down. He squeezed my hand, smiling and staring at me.
Later a low-protein, vegetarian dinner of rice and broccoli was served. I noticed that all the first-time visitors had acquired a new Moonie friend hanging close by their side. "Come on, let's go over and pull up some rug," said a young man, putting his arm around me and beaming. His name was Bob. I noticed he didn't have any food.
"Aren't you eating?" I asked.
"No, I'm fasting this week. It's spiritual fasting. Some of the people in our community do it."
An hour and a half later Bob was still sitting beside me and holding my hand. We were being lectured by a Moonie leader named Sherri Sagar when there was a loud crash at the front door. A man was shouting "Jeannie!" and trying to force his way in. Suddenly at least 25 Moonie reinforcements flooded the entry, trying to push him back out. "Where is Jeannie?" he shouted. "Jeannie! Jeannie!"
"There's no Jeannie here," insisted one of the Moonies. "You'll have to leave."
"What do you mean?" shouted the man, clinging to the door molding. "She came here last week, you bastards! What have you done with her?"
The Moonies kept pushing, peeling his fingers from the door, and finally shoved him outside. We could hear him shouting after the door was closed and locked.
"What was that about?" I asked Bob.
"Just somebody being negative," he said. "People attack us because they don't understand what we're doing."
At the end of the evening everyone clasped hands and formed a circle. "Okay!" said Sherri Sagar. "I hope you all liked what you saw tonight and will come up to our farm. We have cars leaving tonight. But before everybody goes, we're going to do a mass Choo-Choo!" The newcomers shrugged and exchanged glances. "Got it?" she shouted. "It's easy! Just shake your partner's hand until we're through. Ready? One, two, three—Choo-choo-choo! Choo-choo-choo! Choo-choo-choo! Yea, yea, pow!" We newcomers began to laugh, but the Moonies just smiled. "What's the matter?" they asked.
The Dodge van was packed with 15 people heading north to the Moonies' farm at Boonville, Calif. The lecture about the farm had sounded appealing—being out in the country, by a cool creek, with people you liked. Sitting beside me was a Moonie named Joanna. She was 20, already married and divorced. "I'm so inspired now that I'm in the Family, I never want to leave," she said. "There's so much meaning here."
No one had mentioned Moon or the Unification Church yet. I decided to take a chance. "How long have you been in the church?" I asked. Joanna's eyes became distant. For a moment I thought she wasn't going to answer. "How did you know about the church?" she asked finally. "Most people don't know this early."
I told her my cover story, and she seemed satisfied. "Well," she said, smiling again in the darkness, "it's good that you're so open. Most people don't understand and say bad things about us and the Principle."
"What's the Principle?" I asked.
"Well, it's..." Then she stopped. A man on the other side of the van was looking at her with intense disapproval. "You'll get that in the lectures," she said finally. The stranger smiled and nodded. I nodded back.
"How are you feeling, Family?" shouted David, our leader, the next morning. "Great!" everyone yelled.
"Is everyone ready to have the best weekend of your life?"
Dr. Jack was our exercise leader. "Now let's do 25 regular jumping-jacks and 10 free-style." We began bobbing up and down in count with Dr. Jack. I started wondering whether I was 8 or 18. After exercises we were separated into new groups, each recruit accompanied by a Moonie. Eight of us sat on the grass in a tight little circle with blankets and songbooks.
"Okay," said Dr. John, our group leader, supposedly an M.D. from New Zealand. "Let's start off this fantastic day by giving your name and sharing a little bit about you."
When my turn came I talked about Dirk Schwerte, but emotionally I was telling about Scott Keeler ("My mom and dad are divorced. I keep mostly to myself. A lot of people call me a sissy because I don't play sports..."). "That was really fantastic," said Dr. John at the end of the sharing. "It shows how open you can be up here in the fresh air." He laughed as we all clasped hands, and we laughed too. I was beginning to feel so warm and comfortable I wondered why I had ever suspected there was anything wrong with these people. I felt intensely guilty about deceiving them.
The first lecture was a 70-minute presentation of ambiguous references to God, cosmic principles and spirituality. Oriental symbols were put on a blackboard but never explained. After the lecture broke up, we went back to our groups. "Does anyone have any questions?" asked Dr. John. I raised my hand. The other recruits still did not know these people were connected with Reverend Moon and his church. I wondered what would happen if I mentioned it. "You know in the lecture when you talked about God being everywhere?" I began. "Well, is that what the church believes?"
Dr. John dropped his smile. The other Moonies stared at me. A fellow recruit named Paul looked bewildered. "What church?" he asked. No one answered. My eyes locked with Dr. John's for what seemed a long, uneasy time. "That's a good question, Dirk," he said slowly. "Who can answer that?" His eyes never left mine.
"Ah, yeah," Bob began uncertainly. He talked and talked and didn't tell us anything.
It was time for volleyball. "Everybody hug in close," commanded Dr. John. "We've got to be positive and chant so loud every second that we'll love-bomb 'em right out of the game!"
"Yeah, yeah! Great! Yeah!" Every Moonie in our huddle was screaming. I forced a smile and chanted along with everyone else: "Win with love! Win with love!"
"Follow the game!" shouted Dr. John. "Keep your eyes on the ball!" It got easier and easier to chant as I followed the ball with my eyes. I began to lose track of the words I was repeating over and over. I felt I could do anything. A smile spread across my face as I heard our voices echoing off the surrounding hills. Suddenly I fell, and it took me several moments to realize I was on the ground. A Moonie was standing over me. My breath had been knocked out, but I went on chanting "Win with love" in a whisper. I couldn't stop and it scared me. "Are you okay?" he asked. I picked myself up and checked my watch. We had been playing for more than an hour and had finished two games I couldn't even remember.
The next evening I walked to the van to return to San Francisco. I said I was sorry I had to go, and I was. "Where am I ever going to get love like this on the outside?" I thought to myself. I was almost crying, and I went up and hugged Dr. John.
"Look, Dirk," he began slowly, "can't you just call your mom and tell her you'll be home in a couple of days? You can call her right now."
"Sure, just call her now," said Bob. "You like it up here, don't you?"
"Well, yes, but..."
"Good," said Dr. John, "because you can go up to Camp K with us tonight. I'll drive you myself. Why don't you tell your mom now?" Stepping forward, they closed in on me in a way I didn't like, and I took a step backward.
"Hey," I said finally. "I told you, I have to go. I'll be back when everything's straightened out, okay?"
A few days later I did go to Camp K, a converted Girl Scout camp in the Napa Valley where the Moonies continue their indoctrination. Before I went there, I spoke with several authorities on the Unification Church. They warned me that the Moonies were trying to isolate me from the outside world and to keep me from critically examining what they were saying. "If you're good," one of them warned me, "they smile and love-bomb you. But if you argue, then they descend on you." Later one of the Moonies told me the church teaches that you don't have any responsibility to your friends or family; your only duty is to Moon.
By the time I got to Camp K, I was beginning to understand some of the things I guess I hadn't wanted to see before. At Boonville I had become close with a girl named Maureen. At Camp K they deliberately split us up. That's when I realized they were playing with people's lives. Any one-to-one sexual activity is absolutely forbidden. Couples are selected for marriage by church officials, often before they get to know each other. After I left, I seriously thought about kidnapping Maureen and having her deprogrammed. It took me about two months to reach her. I told her who I really was, and she got very defensive. She said, "I'm not leaving here. I'm better off here than on the road." I knew I had to let her go.
In all, I spent three days at Camp K. Then I went back to Ghirardelli Square in San Francisco to continue researching my article and to photograph Moonie recruiters. While I was there I ran into Dr. Jack and another recruiter who knew me. They demanded to know who I was and what I was doing. I told them.
"Give me your film," Dr. Jack demanded quietly, moving close.
I told him I wouldn't.
"Give me the film," he insisted.
"No," I said, trying to hold my ground.
"Give it to me," he droned. "Give me the film."
I grabbed my camera, wrapping the strap around my arm and gripping the lens barrel. I almost gave in from fear, but then I exploded.
"No!" I yelled. "Forget it! I'm not going to give you the film!" People in the park turned and looked at me.
"Scott Keeler?" asked Dr. Jack. "Alameda?"
"Yeah," I said.
"We'll be in touch."
Growing up in the San Francisco Bay area, Scott Keeler, 18, knew what every other teenager knew. As one of his classmates put it, "There's this place you can go if you're fighting with your parents. They'll take care of you." But unlike most of the others, Keeler also knew that the "place," Creative Community Project, was owned and run by the Rev. Sun Myung Moon's Unification Church. As student body president at Alameda, Calif. High School and reporter for his school paper, Oak Leaf, Keeler decided last spring to go underground and investigate the Moonies. Using the alias Dirk Schwerte, he quickly discovered that Moonie recruiters were on the lookout for unattached teenagers. "All anyone has to do," he says, "is put on his backpack and walk down to Fisherman's Wharf." Though no mention was made of Reverend Moon or his church, Keeler was invited to the Moonies' San Francisco headquarters. Here is his account of his bizarre experiences.