Jazz great Pete Fountain, 55, always provides a feast for the ears. But his fans at the New Orleans Jazz and Heritage Festival also got an outrageous eyeful from the veteran clarinetist when he playfully donned a pair of gag glasses during a concert at the Fair Grounds Race Track. Jeepers creepers, better get rid of those peepers.

Taylor made
It was billed as "the world's largest photo session," and, hey, we're not here to quibble. About 2,500 show business and fashion celebrities joined forces at New York's new Jacob Javits Convention Center and helped raise $500,000 to benefit the American Foundation for AIDS Research. But even with the likes of Lily Tomlin, Brooke Shields, Grace Jones and Yoko Ono, everything was on hold until host Elizabeth Taylor arrived—two hours late—on the arm of co-host Calvin Klein. Less than one week later Taylor was honored again, this time at a gala fete given by the Film Society of Lincoln Center for her 40-odd-years' work in the movies.

Eclectic guitarist
Dining out in L.A. sans wife Julianne Phillips, rock superstar Bruce Springsteen appeared sartorially bewildered. Rambo from the waist down and Miami Vice from the waist up, the Boss looked as if he'd been dressing in the dark.

Chapter Three
Lewis Smith, 29, who played Charles Main in last week's TV miniseries, North and South, Book II, turned up at Elaine's with flame Marsha Mason, 44, ex-wife of playwright Neil Simon, at a Manhattan luncheon in the actor's honor. The two, an item for nearly a year, were introduced by Simon's daughter Nancy. Next month Mason heads to California, where she'll begin shooting the action-romance Heartbreak Ridge, in which she plays Clint Eastwood's ex-wife. Go ahead. Make her pucker up.

Satin doll
Looking anything but like her screen alter ego, Lois Lane, Margot Kidder seemed dressed for distress at a New York benefit that raised $45,000 for the Millay Colony for the Arts, in upstate New York, where struggling artists polish their craft. Kidder, who was joined by Kathleen Turner, Ellen Burstyn and Barbara Feldon, may next take up the cause of struggling hatmakers.