HI, FELLAS! OOPS, I MUST BE IN THE wrong casting call. Hey, no, that wasn't me who made the joke about some actors with egos bigger than they are. Hahahahahaha! Don't get sore, okay? I like full-figured men. Especially very big sumo wrestlers! Especially very big American ones.

You bet. I know when director Milos (Valmont) Forman casts his next movie, Hell Camp, he needs a real meathead to play the heavy. Whoa! No, just "kidding. That is, he needs some guys who weigh in at more than 300 lbs. each to portray sumo wrestlers in a script about an American businessman in Japan.

In response to a nationwide casting notice ("No previous acting experience required. Small men need not apply"), 110 big guys braved the 90°F heat in New York City on June 27 to find out if they measured up. (Heavyweights in L.A. and Chicago will also get a chance to show their menace.)

Claiming Jackie Gleason and John Candy as their role-y-poly models, the aspiring stars of the very wide screen—in real life they include plumbers, bouncers, construction workers, a music teacher and the owner of an Italian restaurant—joked nervously before their auditions. "Can Julia Roberts play opposite me?" one asked. "It's a shot in the dark," said a 310-lb. aspirant, "sort of like Rocky." Another confessed, "Please don't tell anybody, but I weigh only 280 lbs. Don't worry, I can eat on the weight." By the end of the day, Forman hadn't crowned any new king-size stars—but everyone had tons of fun.

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Saved by the Bell Reunion

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