HBO's Project Greenlight series, which just completed its second season, may be fascinating to watch, but the movies that have resulted so far—last year's Stolen Summer and now The Battle of Shaker Heights—are the cinematic equivalent of liver. They mean well, but who really likes this stuff? For those who've missed the series, Greenlight's gimmick is that pals Matt Damon and Ben Affleck, serving as producers, help select a script and fledgling filmmakers, hand over $1 million or so and then document the process as the tyro directors (there are two on Heights) and screenwriter struggle to make their low-budget, would-be masterpiece.
Heights is an earnest coming-of-age story that is so scattershot in its approach to getting to the bottom of what's troubling Kelly (LaBeouf), its 17-year-old protagonist, that one's patience with his antics quickly wears thin. A suburban high school student, Kelly spends his weekends taking part in re-enactments of military battles, partly to escape his clueless parents (Quinlan and William Sadler), who have problems of their own.
LaBeouf, who was winning earlier this year in Holes, here is hamstrung by a script that with every scene changes its mind about who he is and what his problem is. (PG-13) BOTTOM LINE: No one emerges victorious
Ashton Kutcher, Tara Reid
Gigli now has competition for the coveted title of worst movie of the summer. Okay, maybe My Boss's Daughter, an inept comedy directed by David Zucker (BASEketball), isn't as self-important as Gigli and its stars aren't as glittery, but a stinker by any name still reeks. Here, current It Boy Kutcher plays a nice guy in Chicago who house-sits his boss's suburban mansion, hoping to cozy up to his superior's comely daughter (Reid). Alleged hilarity ensues as moronic mishaps galore occur, including a mouse scampering down Kutcher's pants and Reid surprising him as he gropes, at their request, the chests of two lady visitors (Carmen Electra and Molly Shannon). "I was just checking these girls for breast cancer," Kutcher tells Reid.
That's the kind of line that 14-year-old boys snigger at delightedly and quote to peers as evidence of a film's high humor quotient. Here's hoping they'll grow out of it. (PG-13) BOTTOM LINE: Dumb and dumberer
Jackie Chan, Claire Forlani
There's always at least one mesmerizing, pull-out-all-stops scene in a Chan picture and in Medallion, an otherwise banal bit of action fluff, it comes as his cop character chases a bad guy through Dublin. Chan hurdles cafe tables with ease, pirouettes across a row of parked bicycles and slithers through barred gates as if boneless. At age 49, he remains the Michael Jordan of movie stuntwork.
Medallion's plot has Chan rushing from Hong Kong to Ireland to rescue a holy child who has been kidnapped by a villain (Julian Sands) who covets the boy's necklace, which imbues its holder with eternal life. That may explain why this movie seemed to last an eternity. (PG-13) BOTTOM LINE: Deserves no medals
Lisa Kudrow, Damon Wayans
This is a messy disaster at which you can only scratch your head and mutter, "What were they thinking?" What they—writer Paul Rudnick (In & Out) and director Richard Benjamin (Mrs.Winterbourne)—obviously had in their noggins was to poke fun at gangsta rap, corporate greed, public watchdogs and spoiled socialites (here, a Jewish one), all at the same time. But the result is a misfire of a satire unlikely to show up on the résumés of anyone involved.
Kudrow plays Marci, a ditsy heiress who falls for Dr. S (Wayans), a trash-talking rapper who records for a label owned by Marci's dad's megacorporation. They unite against a publicity-seeking senator (Christine Baranski) who wants to ban Dr. S's music. Satire must be grounded in reality to work, and nothing and no one here remotely resembles real life. Except, that is, for a wicked parody of a boy band, featuring a prancing group of fetching youths collectively called Boyz 'R' Us. (R) BOTTOM LINE: X-tremely lousy
•Casablanca (Warner, $26.99) You must remember this, and if you don't, it's time you discovered one of Hollywood's greatest classics, a film full of romance, drama, heartbreak and such oft-quoted lines as, "Here's looking at you, kid." When watching, keep in mind that while they were shooting Casablanca (1942), set in Morocco during WWII, stars Humphrey Bogart and Ingrid Bergman didn't know if they'd end up together since the writers were retooling the script daily. Extras: This two-disc DVD, saluting the 60th anniversary of Casablanca's Best Picture Oscar win in 1943 and featuring a lustrous, new digital transfer print, is loaded with desirable goodies, including an insightful, enthusiastic audio commentary by film critic Roger Ebert, solid documentaries about the film and Bogart (both narrated by Lauren Bacall, his widow), plus minor outtakes and deleted scenes.
Saved by the Bell Reunion
The hookups, the meltdowns, the memoires
The case reveals what was really going on what they think of each other now!
