FOX (Wed., Jan. 26, 9 p.m. ET)
They tried farm life; they took a road trip. Now Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie will be staying in a different home and sampling a new job in each episode of The Simple Life: Interns. They haven't changed their "Look at us—we're spoiled!" routine, but let's accept the sameness and deal with the two-episode premiere on its own terms. How might Paris put it?
That's hot: It's funny that these jet-setters are reduced to taking the bus. "There's people on it," Nicole sniffs as the Greyhound pulls up to transport them from Manhattan to Bayonne, N.J.
That's not: The bus takes the girls directly to the house of their first hosts, and apparently they'll get door-to-door service for the rest of the series. No waiting in smelly stations. Too convenient.
That's hot: Reporting for duty at an auto-repair center, Paris and Nicole immediately complain about the baggy polyester uniforms and ask for the nearest lingerie store. Why sacrifice style and comfort?
That's not: Totally predictable comedy. It's only a matter of time before Nicole backs one vehicle into another.
That's hot: The premiere's best laugh comes when our fair interns mess up an advertising firm's mail room and their supervisor sputters, "This is really, really not cool. This is super not cool."
That's not: Ignorance and stereotyping aren't amusing. Paris sees no difference between China and Japan, and the girls start yakking about Mafia connections as soon as they meet their Italian-American hosts in Staten Island.
That's most definitely not: Paris and Nicole have three dogs in tow, and the pampered pets poop twice on their hosts' carpets. Must we see the evidence?
DRAMA
Court TV (Thurs., Jan. 27, 9 p.m. ET)
Watch this important film—and keep it in mind next time you see a sweaty suspect being grilled on a cop show.
Adapted from a hit Off-Broadway production, The Exonerated relies mostly on monologues to tell the real-life stories of six Americans who managed to gain vindication after being sent to death row for crimes they didn't commit. The cast members—Susan Sarandon, Delroy Lindo, Brian Dennehy, Danny Glover, Aidan Quinn and newcomer David Brown Jr.—speak to us so convincingly that the occasional dramatized flashbacks seem superfluous.
We feel the pain of Kerry Max Cook (Quinn), who was brutalized during 22 years in prison, and grasp why David Keaton (Glover) still looks bewildered three decades after he first insisted to the police, "I don't know what you're talking about." We hear that line often on TV, and we shouldn't forget it's sometimes true.
CBS (Sun., Jan. 23, 10 p.m. ET)
A Beautiful Mind was a hit movie about a brilliant mathematician. So why not a TV series about one of those guys who get lost in thought, then dash off cutting-edge equations? Of course Charlie Eppes (David Krumholtz) has to use his gift to solve crimes or CBS would never put him on the air.
Numb3rs—the title only looks like a typo—has a Sunday premiere before moving to Fridays at 10, where dr. vegas died. The opening case of a rapist-killer is as grisly as the stuff on the three CSIs, and the script gains suspense by planting doubt about whether Charlie's applied mathematics can really help his brother, FBI agent Don (Rob Morrow), to pinpoint the perp's location. But we're left wondering how many plausible excuses can be found for the Eppes boys to collaborate while their pop (Judd Hirsch) kibitzes. Though Krumholtz captures Charlie's combination of genius and immaturity, Morrow's straight-arrow role sorely needs a few dabs of color.
FOX (Fridays, 9 p.m. ET)
This new series has a title that recklessly courts ridicule—"Zero? They got that right"—but I might grow to like it if I could figure out what it wants to be.
Ex-con Jonny Calvo (Franky G from The Italian Job) wants to reform but reluctantly goes back to work for his old boss, corrupt New York club owner Garret (Ritchie Coster), while serving as a snitch for ruthless FBI agent Stringer (Chris Bauer). Sounds like a dark, Wiseguy-type drama. But wait: Jonny shares a funky pad with goofball hip-hopper Random (rapper-actor GQ), who gets the bright idea that they should hire themselves out as "alternative investigators." Okay, maybe this will be an offbeat private-eye thing. Hold on, though: Jonny also takes a job in a boxing gym, where he trains a potential million-dollar baby and tries to extricate her from gang life.
Franky G has appeal, but the show is hurt by its uncertain tone and Jonny's multitasking. He could simplify his life by cutting Random out of it.
Desperate Housewives (ABC, Jan. 23, 9 p.m. ET) Lynette (Felicity Huffman) learns a family secret when her father-in-law (guest star Ryan O'Neal) pays a visit.
Dirty War (HBO, Jan. 24, 9 p.m. ET) A TV movie shows what might happen if terrorists struck central London with a radioactive bomb.
Window on the Hill (Lifetime, Jan. 24, 9 p.m. ET) For a trashier original movie, try Natasha Henstridge as a sexy nurse accused of murdering her rich older husband (James Brolin).
Academy Award Nomination (various channels, Jan. 25, 8:30 a.m. ET) Start your day with the live announcement of the Oscar contenders.
Scrubs (NBC, Jan. 25, 9 p.m. ET) He's better cast here than in Alexander. Colin Farrell guest-stars as a wild Irishman who winds up in Sacred Heart Hospital after a bar fight.
American Idol is back, its format freshened up with a number of changes. Celebrity judges are off the finals, guys and girls perform on separate nights, and the upper age limit for contestants has gone from 24 to 28. As a fan who has occasionally felt that Idol was getting stale, I have a few additional tweaks for the producers' consideration:
1. Fewer auditions, please, not more. This would directly contravene one of the new changes, which expands the audition episodes from last season's three weeks to five weeks. Why? So the fertile fields of America's wannabes can be combed for every possible William Hung?
2. Enough with the Celine Dion tributes. Stop ransacking the old pop catalog for theme programs. (How about a South Park night? Imagine Clay Aiken singing "Blame Canada.") And isn't there some other song style than Dion-scaled belting and trilling (à la Kelly Clarkson, left)? The kids put across their numbers with gutsy power, but the booming of those vocal cannons gets monotonous.
3. Declaw Simon. Yes, he's indispensable to creating tension. He's the viper coiled to strike. But I wish, for one night, Paula would be the vicious one while Simon beamed, purred, petted and twinkled. Let the judges break out of character.
4. And bring back Brian Dunkleman (right), Ryan Seacrest's cohost from season 1. I miss his lurking, unpredictable snarkiness. Or is it just me?
- Contributors:
- Terry Kelleher,
- Tom Gliatto.
Saved by the Bell Reunion
The hookups, the meltdowns, the memoires
The case reveals what was really going on what they think of each other now!
