They Said What? for Dec. 28, 2004
"My stomach is enormous, and the bigger it gets the smaller my ass looks. So I'm kind of enjoying this."
– New mom Julia Roberts, just days before giving birth to twins Phinnaeus Walter and Hazel Patricia
"The only thing I haven't done so far is experience the closest thing to God and that's having a baby. I can't wait!"
– Newlywed Britney Spears, to fans on her Web site
"Go for the epidural."
– Gwyneth Paltrow, who gave birth to baby Apple in May
"Today after months of build-up and anticipation, Star Jones made history and became the first person ever to get married."
– Saturday Night Live's Tina Fey, after the View host's well-promoted nuptials
"I'll never get married again."
– Halle Berry, to Oprah Winfrey, after enduring two failed marriages
"I could argue with this spoon and it would be the same as arguing with you."
– Nick Lachey, to Jessica Simpson, on Newlyweds
"Rude, vile pigs. Do you know what that means? Rude, vile pigs. That's what all of you are."
– Elton John, to the paparazzi awaiting him at the airport in Taipei, Taiwan
"I didn't go and cheat the little people. We're all little people."
– Martha Stewart, to Barbara Walters, before entering prison
"Everybody gets a car! Everybody gets a car! Everybody gets a car!"
– Oprah Winfrey, surprising 276 audience members at the season premiere of her talk show
"There are so many people that are responsible for this, that if I even try to thank any of them right now, I might puke, choke, cry or die. And you've already seen me do that."
– Drea de Matteo, upon winning an Emmy for her role as Adriana on the Sopranos
"I didn't know what to do so I thought I'd do a hoe-down."
– Ashlee Simpson, after her botched performance on Saturday Night Live
"If they don't have the guts to come up here in front of you and say, 'I don't want to represent you, I want to represent those special interests, the unions, the trial lawyers ...' If they don't have the guts, I call them girlie men."
– California Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger, challenging Democrats in the state's legislature over the budget quagmire
"(Fans) can say whatever they want to, but once they come close enough to touch you or throw something on you, you have the right to beat the hell out of them."
– Former NBA player and TNT commentator Charles Barkley, on the brawl at the Pacers-Pistons game
"It's more bad news for the man known worldwide as the King of Pop, which is apparently what they call you when you're good for 9 years, great for 2 and crappy for about 20."
– The Daily Show's Jon Stewart, on Michael Jackson
– Paris Hilton