• Britney Spears, calling out Paris Hilton's beloved Chihuahua, in a letter to fans
• "Who's going to watch us when they can watch a hot, shirtless guy build a skate ramp for a kid with no bones?"
– Arrested Development's Jason Bateman, musing on his FOX show's ratings competition, ABC's Extreme Makeover Home Edition, on Saturday Night Live
• "Everybody wanted to know what I would do if I didn't win. I guess we'll never know."
– Kanye West, upon winning a Grammy for best rap album (The College Dropout)
• "This is the trippiest thing I've ever gone through in my life."
– Maroon 5 lead singer Adam Levine, accepting his group's best new artist Grammy
• "I'm gonna miss nine years of kissing without tongue."
– Ray Romano, on fake-smooching TV wife Patricia Heaton. The last episode of Everybody Loves Raymond airs May 16
• "My whole take on fashion is, 'Try not to get made fun of.' "
– Cursed star and vintage clothes fan Christina Ricci
• "(Among) all the brilliance that congregates here at gorgeous Harvard, it's nice to know that there's not one ounce of class."
Catherine Zeta-Jones
Gail Oskin / WireImage
• "Fragrance is a necessity on days you don't have time to shower."
– Sarah Jessica Parker, on why she's developing her own fragrance
• "I assume this is what comes of being 42 and single."
– Desperate Housewives star Marcia Cross, denying rumors that she is a lesbian
• "Next week, Ashlee Simpson is launching her tour. When asked about it, Ashlee said, 'Luckily if I'm late, they can always start without me.' "
– Conan O'Brien
