Britney Spears, calling out Paris Hilton's beloved Chihuahua, in a letter to fans
"Who's going to watch us when they can watch a hot, shirtless guy build a skate ramp for a kid with no bones?"
– Arrested Development's Jason Bateman, musing on his FOX show's ratings competition, ABC's Extreme Makeover Home Edition, on Saturday Night Live
"Everybody wanted to know what I would do if I didn't win. I guess we'll never know."
– Kanye West, upon winning a Grammy for best rap album (The College Dropout)
"This is the trippiest thing I've ever gone through in my life."
– Maroon 5 lead singer Adam Levine, accepting his group's best new artist Grammy
"I'm gonna miss nine years of kissing without tongue."
– Ray Romano, on fake-smooching TV wife Patricia Heaton. The last episode of Everybody Loves Raymond airs May 16
"My whole take on fashion is, 'Try not to get made fun of.' "
– Cursed star and vintage clothes fan Christina Ricci
"(Among) all the brilliance that congregates here at gorgeous Harvard, it's nice to know that there's not one ounce of class."
Gail Oskin / WireImage
"Fragrance is a necessity on days you don't have time to shower."
– Sarah Jessica Parker, on why she's developing her own fragrance
"I assume this is what comes of being 42 and single."
– Desperate Housewives star Marcia Cross, denying rumors that she is a lesbian
"Next week, Ashlee Simpson is launching her tour. When asked about it, Ashlee said, 'Luckily if I'm late, they can always start without me.' "
– Conan O'Brien