– Drew Barrymore, wearing huge fake breasts to spoof her braless look at the Golden Globes, to Tina Fey on Saturday Night Live
"At the opera a little while ago. ... We were in the ladies' room, and when we heard an old woman start to tinkle, we couldn't help but crack up. I guess she told the security guy."
– Barrymore's boyfriend, Strokes drummer Fabrizio Moretti, on the strangest place he's ever had sex, to Jane
"I meet so many people. I don't even know some of my friends' names."
– Paris Hilton, in her deposition from the $10 million slander suit against her
"Constitutionally, within the context of the show, I knew I was done."
– Martin Sheen, on the cancellation of The West Wing after seven seasons, to PEOPLE
"My wife's out of town, so Alfonso's the date. He wouldn't wear the dress I picked out."
– Will Smith, on bringing his former Fresh Prince of Bel-Air costar Alfonso Ribeiro to the Producers Guild Awards
Eric Charbonneau / WireImage
– Underworld: Evolution star Kate Beckinsale, to British GQ
"The line between making a total ass out of yourself and being fundamentally funny is very narrow."
– William Shatner, to Esquire
"My wife wants me to fire my agent."
– James Denton, on his female-filled gigs acting on Desperate Housewives and hosting the Miss America pageant