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I Know What You're Thinking – I'm Fat !

Originally posted Thursday April 05, 2007 12:00 PM EDT

"I want to be a great stepmom," says Bertinelli (with, from left, Angela, Wolfgang, Tom, Dominic, Andie and Tony). Photo by: STEPHEN DANELIAN

Looking back, she acknowledges that the stressful period after their split – during which she also was commuting between L.A. and the Touched by an Angel set in Utah – contributed to her expanding waistline: "I was in the airport five days a week. I would fly home just to tuck Wolfie in before going back to work." Meanwhile "the show kept buying me bigger and bigger clothes – a size14 felt tight – but nobody made me feel bad about it," she recalls. What's more, her workouts were half-hearted. "If I used a pedometer and didn't get 3,000 steps a day, I was like, 'Oh, screw it,' " she says with a shrug.

She also avoided the dating scene for several years: "I was really trying to get my head on straight." Then in 2004 Bertinelli's brother Patrick introduced her to Vitale, 45, a former financial planner, at a wine-tasting event in Arizona. "I was basically a seat-filler for their extra ticket – it wasn't really a date," recalls Vitale, who has four children from a previous marriage. But the attraction was there. "I wanted to kiss him the first time I saw him," she says. The next day the two met up at Patrick's house. "I thought, 'Wow, this is how it's supposed to be with a woman,'" says Vitale. Two weeks later they were together watching Wolfie play with his dad at a Van Halen concert.

For her son, having a new man around was initially challenging. "I felt like he was taking her away from me, and I was really protective of my mom," says Wolfie. But since Vitale moved into their hilltop home last year with his son Tony, 16, the blended family has occasionally even come to include Van Halen and his girlfriend Janie Liszewski, who says, "I lucked out to be brought into such a closeknit family." Last month the whole group celebrated Wolfie's birthday. "We had a huge cake, but Mom ate her Jenny Craig fettuccine," says Wolfie. "I'm proud of her; she's really working for it." (Vitale is too: He's lost 8 lbs. so far.) For now Bertinelli is taking things one pound at a time – and looking ahead to that celebratory martini, among other rewards. In the past, "I would treat myself with a steak dinner," she says. "Now, if I want to give myself a treat it will be a new pair of shoes or a handbag. And when I get down enough, an even better treat – a new pair of jeans!"