Marilyn Manson and Evan Rachel Wood
08/14/2007 AT 02:15 PM EDT
Evan Rachel Wood's inspiration to make a sex video with her boyfriend, rocker Marilyn Manson, was to "show that it's okay to have different, weird ideas about romance."
"At the end of the video, we're kissing and it's raining blood – and for me, that was one of the most romantic moments of my entire life," Wood, 19, says in the September issue of GQ
The music video for Mason's song, "Heart-Shaped Glasses" – which Wood explains does not contain actual sex – caused quite a stir, but to hear the actress's description, it's artistic and sentimental.
"We made it for each other ... Because that's how we were feeling at the time: Even though ugliness can be all around you – you can literally be in a thunderstorm of blood – if you look past that, it really is just two people holding on to each other.
"And you know, the same thing with the sex scene. If you're going to have a sex scene, that's what it is," Wood continues. "When you're with someone and you're in love, that's usually what happens. It's not always soft. Sometimes it's somebody screaming or whatever."
The self-described "shy, painfully shy" teen says that her "healthy, loving" relationship
with Manson, 38, would surprise people – as would how loudly he snores, which, she says, in fact lulls her to sleep.
"For the first time," she says, "I really feel like I'm around somebody and in an environment where I can just let go and not worry about being judged.
"And I'm sorry if I have blond hair and blue eyes and my boyfriend looks like a vampire. What do you want me to do about it?"
Wood has three films out this fall, including Across the Universe
, in which she stars as a young woman caught up in the whirl of the anti-Vietnam War movement. The film is a kind of Beatles rock opera, and Wood even sings her own songs.
"I think it's some of the most personal acting I've ever done," she says, "because I'm more aware of myself now. Before, I didn't realize how therapeutic acting was for me – how much of myself I was letting out."