HE DOESN'T DRINK
"I've never had a drink or drug. I want someone who wants to feel the moments of life and doesn't need a substance to enhance or decrease the experience."
SHE'LL BE A PUNCH LINE
"There was one relationship in which some stuff went down, and this girl was like, 'You're not going to talk about this onstage, right? 'It goes with the territory: If you date a comedian, life is the performance, and you better get comfortable with it."
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