The sound track ends with the theme music from Bugs Bunny, which says something, though Bugs has rarely had to deliver dialogue as bad as what's in this parody of the Old West. Arnold Schwarzenegger plays a virginal cowboy with an Austrian accent who's hired to protect a horny gal, Ann-Margret, from Kirk Douglas, who is painfully miscast as a bungling bandit. The attempts to rob—and ravish—A-M are embarrassing. Director Hal Needham offers some breathtaking Monument Valley scenery and startling stunt work (he's an ace stunt man himself), but the jokes sound like early rejects from Blazing Saddles. Even Ruth Buzzi, playing a damsel in distress, and Paul Lynde, as an Indian chief who gets migraines from the sound of tom-toms, are hard put to round up a laugh. (PG)
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