09/15/1980 at 01:00 AM EDT
A Wine Card
So what if Woody Allen showed up with Mia Farrow for dinner at Xochitls, a Mexican eatery in New York's theater district, carrying his own bottle of wine although the restaurant has a liquor license? And so what if the couple held hands for an hour and ordered only guacamole? It's not as if Woody and Mia were trying to save money. When they left, curious patrons looked inside the plastic bag that contained Woody's bottle. Still half full, it was a 1971 Burgundy, an Echezeaux. Retail price: around $50.
In his speech to the Democratic convention, Jimmy Carter said "Hubert Horatio Hornblower" would have been one of the greatest Presidents of all time. He meant to say "Humphrey"—or did he? Now a Washington insider claims that in the Carter White House, Humphrey, who died in 1978, was always considered a "loser" and was frequently referred to as Hubert H. Horn-blower, or just Hornblower, in derision. The same source says that Teddy Kennedy is commonly called "the fat rich kid" among the Carter inner circle.
The Emperor's Old Clothes
The uniforms on the Southern Utah State College marching band this football season may look familiar (if moth-eaten). Richard Nixon ordered them sewn up for his White House police in 1970 but rarely used them after critics suggested they made a state dinner resemble a Sigmund Romberg operetta. President Ford relegated them to a Washington warehouse. When they were declared surplus three years ago, SUSC applied for all 120—and was awarded 80 (after an application from Alice Cooper, who wanted them for his act, was turned down). The 76 that arrived (the shipment was, mysteriously, four short) were without insignia and gold buttons. Because the uniforms are technically on loan, music professor David Nyman agreed they would not be sold, leased, encumbered, cannibalized, dismantled, seized, stolen, damaged, destroyed or—except in special cases—allowed to leave Utah. What about the Adams State game in Colorado next month? No matter: The band can't afford to go anyway. One reason: The "free" uniforms have already cost them $554 for new buttons.
Martina Navratilova was tired of chasing balls around the tennis court at her $300,000 Virginia estate, but hiring resident ballboys seemed expensive. So she imported a pair of retrievers (eight-pound Akita dogs) from Japan. "It wasn't hard to teach them to chase the balls," Martina laments, "but they kept bringing them back chewed up." Worse, the tennis star developed a runny nose, then a full-blown case of hives, and it turned out Martina was allergic to the pups, Herman and Bobby. Anyone for a pair of used Akitas?
•Four years after telling all in her autobiography, Doris Day is updating the story. Explaining why she switched in 1948 to Christian Science from Catholicism ("Somehow, it wasn't enough for me"), Day says: "I used to go to confession and make up sins because I didn't want to waste the priest's time."
•Maybe he should call it Me Dearest. At work on his autobiography, Burt Reynolds reveals, "I've started on the first chapter and find it hysterically funny, sexy and provocative. And that chapter," he adds, "only covers my first year in grammar school."
•Comedian Henny Youngman played on the same bill with Charo at the Westbury (N.Y.) Music Fair this summer. "There was a small hole in the wall between our dressing rooms," Henny remembers. "So I let her watch."