Picks and Pans Review: Futile: the Magazine of Adult Dating

UPDATED 01/16/1984 at 01:00 AM EST Originally published 01/16/1984 at 01:00 AM EST

by Sara Parriott

It's not really a magazine, but a very funny kind of parody of the Cosmo school of courting counseling. Stories hyped on the cover include: "I Slept with Armand Assante—I Think" and "Dating as a Career." The articles include "How to Be the Date You Think Your Date Wants You to Be" (women seeking corporate men are advised to wear wing-tip pumps) and a survey of daters, one of whom says, "Before Lou came along, I led a lonely, shallow and meaningless life. Now it's just shallow and meaningless." Parriott, a Los Angeles TV writer (The Voyagers) and author of comedy books (Calories Don't Count When...) has an unforced, resignedly ironic sense of humor. For the imaginary next issue of Futile, she promises such articles as "Why Singles Dream About Sharks," "Dates Are People, Too" and "I Slept with Guillermo Vilas—I Think." She is at least funny enough to make all people who are currently married want to stay that way and anyone who is single want to hie him or herself off to a monastery or nunnery immediately. (Workman, paper, $5.95)

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