Picks and Pans Review: The Final Terror
While they are probably not bragging about it, both Daryl (Splash) Hannah and Rachel (The Thorn Birds) Ward have featured roles in this 1982 film. It is of the boys-and-girls-vs.-the-monster-in-the-woods genre, and it feels like a class project from the USC film school—one that got a D plus. It's never clear exactly who this group of young people is or what the monster is up to. Adrian (T.J. Hooker) Zmed is in the cast too, and while he, Hannah and Ward avoid embarrassing themselves, this is still gibberish. (In one scene, Ward saves Hannah from bleeding to death after her throat has been cut by the monster; Ward sews up the foot-long wound right there in the forest, using a needle from a first-aid kit.) To call the release of this film cynical is to understate the case by several quanta; if it weren't for the exploitable success of Hannah and Ward, the movie would still be moldering in whatever crypt holds all those lousy ideas that never make the screen. (R)
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