ABC (Sat., Sept. 21, 8 p.m. ET)
F
And here is the worst show of the season: Miami Vice for morons. The stars, Jack Scalia and Jay Acovone, try to imitate Starsky, Hutch, Renko, Belker and Ratso Rizzo, but they'd have a tough time imitating dead trees. Strictly amateur hour. The producers try to make Beat look like Vice by shooting lights reflected in the well-polished hoods of cars. The similarity ends there. The writers put lines such as this one in the mouths of hookers: "Gotta make ends meet, if you'll pardon the expression." Hookers aren't paid for their humor. And the street people on the show are so unconvincing they make Hollywood Boulevard look like Mister Rogers' neighborhood. Hollywood Beat is nothing but violence set to music. It is trash badly done.
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