HER CO-STAR WAS A REAL PEST: A Joan Collins Film Tribute might sound like a contradiction in terms, but an event of that name drew nearly 2,000 people to San Francisco's Castro Theatre. An hour-long retrospective of Collins' 34-year career, which included clips from Sea Wife, The Wayward Bus and Tales From the Crypt, was followed by a Q & A session. Asked if she had any regrets in her life, Collins replied, "Yes, some of these films we've just seen. Now I understand why I'm criticized for my past work." At least Collins was grateful that her 1977 flick Empire of the Ants wasn't shown. "To be asphyxiated by a papier-mâché ant," she said, "is the lowest you can get."
A PEACE-PEEPING MISSION: Addressing a group of fans in Claremont, Calif., Carol Burnett promised never to do a nude scene. "I wouldn't take off my clothes," she said. "There's enough violence in the world."
NOW HE'S GUNNING FOR STARDOM: Glenn Frey had a tough time getting a handle on his role in Let's Get Harry, the rocker's feature film debut. The movie, which is scheduled for summer release, stars Robert Duvall, Gary Busey and Frey as blue-collar workers who rescue a kidnapped buddy in Central America. Told that he'd be trained to use UZIs, MAC-10s and M60s, ex-Eagle Frey admitted he had limited experience with weapons. "The only thing I've ever fired," he said, "is a guitar player."
YOU SORTA GET HOOKED ON IT: At a Women in Show Business luncheon honoring Loretta Swit, the keynote address was given by Irma Kalish. A sitcom writer whose credits include Maude and All in the Family, Kalish likened writing to the world's oldest profession. "First you do it for your own enjoyment," she said. "Then you do it for a few friends. Eventually you figure, 'What the hell, I might as well get paid for it.' "
HIS DOG DAYS ARE OVER: In one of the most memorable scenes in Down and Out in Beverly Hills, a pet therapist tries to talk Mike the dog into eating his food. Though the film actually spoofs such practitioners, Down and Out's success has created a growing demand for pet shrinks. At least that's the opinion of Warren Eckstein, who has ministered to Lily Tomlin's Norwich Terrier, Tess, Al Pacino's two mutts, Lucky and Suzie, and Cheryl Tiegs's Wire Fox Terrier, Martini. "People used to belittle the profession," says Eckstein, "but now everyone has a question about his pet. Going to parties is real work—it's become worse than being a doctor or a lawyer."
PRESIDENTIAL MATERIAL: Now that Rep. Berkley Bedell (D-Iowa) has dropped his bid for reelection, things are looking up for former Love Boat purser Fred Grandy, who is seeking the Republican nomination from Bedell's district. Grandy, who is also waiting for the Democrats to name his new opponent, says he doesn't miss show business. "I'm using my acting skills more now than I ever did in Hollywood."
IT ALL COMES OUT IN THE WASH: In his just-completed movie, Jade Jungle, David Carradine wages war on members of a Chinese tong. But some Asian watchdog groups may soon want to wage war on him. Carradine was asked if he thought Jade Jungle portrays Orientals in a demeaning light. "No," he said, "I've been making films like this for years, and I'm still welcome in any Chinese restaurant. Even when Orientals play bad guys, they're still working. Otherwise they'd be playing laundrymen."
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