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Worst of Tube

updated 12/22/1986 AT 01:00 AM EST

originally published 12/22/1986 AT 01:00 AM EST

Apology
Not only senseless but sick, this made-for-cable movie tittered about a murderer who castrated for kicks.

Barbra Streisand in Putting It Together
TV screen, TV screen, on the wall, who's the most egotistical of them all?

Better Days
A shockingly racist sitcom that looked as if it had been produced by South African TV.

Death of a Salesman
Dustin Hoffman deigns to appear on the small screen. That doesn't mean we all have to bow down and kiss his small feet. This rendition of Arthur Miller's play had all the subtlety of a hog-calling contest. Even harder to take was the PBS American Masters documentary about the baking of this ham.

Jack and Mike
This one narrowly beats Kay O'Brien in succeeding at the impossible: defaming Yuppies.

Life With Lucy
Too sad for words.

North and South: Book II
Between Book I and Book II, bosoms and belly laughs were replaced with bullets and bombast. The result: boredom.

Phil Donahue Examines the Human Animal
Some of us animals would have preferred to have been on Zoo Parade.

Statue of Liberty
Loved the Lady, hated the hype. The birthday coverage lent patriotism all the class of a discount store's flashing blue-light special.

Various vidploitation
The networks keep taking advantage of disease, crime, fear and their victims for cheap, cold rating points. Shattered Spirits and Vital Signs used alcoholism, The Right of the People and Outrage crime, One Terrific Guy and Welcome Home, Bobby child molestation, The Children of Times Square runaway kids, The Deliberate Stranger mass murder, Under Siege terrorism and Kate's Secret bulimia. Enough.

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