02/01/1993 at 01:00 AM EST
'S MOVIE MISADVENTURE
MOVIE CRITIC ROGER EBERT GAVE IT HALF A STAR SUSAN STARK OF The Detroit News called it "trash." And in Peoria, where sexy is not supposed to "play" without Sturm und Drang, 52 people gathered in a 237-seat theater and giggled. Body of Evidence did not have an opening night to remember. Below, a roundup of reactions from around the U.S.:
Loew's Fresh Pond Cinema, Cambridge, Mass.
Marketplace Cinemas, Marina del Key, Calif.
Water Tower Theatre, Chicago
Pembroke Pines 8, Fort Lauderdale
United Artists East Theater, Manhattan
Renaissance Theatre, Detroit
Belly laughs that dwindled to snorts and cackles
Sighs, coughs, nose blowing
Gasps of discomfort during hot-wax scene
Chuckles at reference to nipple clamps
Applause at Madonna
's first nude scene; laughs when Anne Archer calls her a "coke-head slut"
A combination of laughter and squirming during S & M stuff
"Stupid and contusing."
"I'm thinking about sneaking into A Few Good Men."
"Joe Mantegna does it for me."
"I'm traumatized. Madonna
must work out all the time.
"She's got ugly panties."
"Without the sex, it could have been a made-for-TV movie."