In Her Own Voice

updated 03/29/2004 AT 01:00 AM EST

originally published 03/29/2004 AT 01:00 AM EST

I can't marry him!" Diana Spencer groaned to her sisters on the eve of her wedding. She did, of course, and became a very unhappy princess. But now, in tapes she made in the early '90s (recently aired by NBC in a two-part documentary), the princess herself details the depths of her despair, from her rampant bulimia to her "four or five" suicide attempts. The some-what mundane videotapes were made during public-speaking lessons with voice coach Peter Settelen. The more inflammatory audiotapes were made in 1991 by a friend of Diana's, James Colthurst, who gave them, with her consent, to author Andrew Morton for his book Diana: Her True Story. Though not yet aired in Britain, their release has enraged friends of both Diana and Charles. Notes her pal Rosa Monckton, who was interviewed by NBC but says she was not aware the tapes would be shown: "This can only cause huge upset to her sons." (NBC had no comment.) A source close to Charles says, "You never hear his perspective. He never says anything negative about her." It's unlikely Princes William and Harry have heard the tapes. Even if they were to, "I expect," says a family friend, Lady Harrod, "they have protective armor."

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