Kate Gosselin and Ellen DeGeneres
Michael Rozman/Warner Bros.
10/28/2009 AT 10:00 AM EDT
Just because she's not wearing her wedding ring
much of the time anymore doesn't mean that Kate Gosselin
's back on the market. In fact, the reality-show mom says it's not going to happen while she remains the focus of so much media attention.
"I'm not thinking about it, but the thought has crossed my mind at some point [that] it's going to be scrutinized," Gosselin, 34, tells Ellen DeGeneres
on an episode of her talk show set to air Wednesday. "Let's not talk about it."
DeGeneres agrees: "Exactly, and some guy is going to have that same concern."
Gosselin says she tries to live her life surrounded by cameras – and "the 18 cars that follow me around" – by thinking of her eight children.
"I just know that, on TV or off TV, I've been very much targeted and torn apart," she says. "I'm telling you [from] the root of my heart everything about me: I am a mother first. I will always be a mother and I would die for my kids if need be ... My focus is them. It's not the paparazzi. My focus is not what trip I can go on or what shows I can do as a result of this thing. This is my job. This is my paycheck and so this is what I do."
But the kids, Gosselin says, are getting used to the idea of Kate minus Jon – and a wedding ring
"At some point, I talked to the kids it came up very naturally and I said I'm not going to be wearing this ring very much longer," she says. "They said, 'Oh, why?' I said, 'Because I'm not going to be married to Daddy anymore,' which, of course, hearing that I don't think was fun for them."