Michelle Obama's Secrets to Finding a Great Guy
10/28/2009 AT 10:50 AM EDT
"Cute's good. But cute only lasts for so long, and then it's, 'Who are you as a person?' " Obama, 45, says in the December issue of Glamour, out Nov. 10. "Don't look at the bankbook or the title. Look at the heart. Look at the soul. When you're dating a man, you should always feel good. ... You shouldn't be in a relationship with somebody who doesn't make you completely happy and make you feel whole."
Also important, according to the pop-culture-loving First Lady, who's been married to President Barack Obama since 1992: Getting your priorities straight.
"I have always tried to put my kids first, and then put myself a really close second, as opposed to fifth or seventh," she says. "One thing that I've learned from male role models is that they don't hesitate to invest in themselves."