Jessica Simpson Advises: No Man Can Define You

04/02/2010 at 11:00 AM EDT

Jessica Simpson Advises: No Man Can Define You
Jessica Simpson
She's been described as "sexual napalm" by ex-boyfriend John Mayer. Her relationship with Tony Romo broke up the night before her 29th birthday. And her marriage to Nick Lachey played out before millions on national TV.

All that experience has given Jessica Simpson some strong advice for women looking for love: Don't look to a man to build your own confidence.

"I think you really have to know who you are before you can truly fall in love and give your all, and I don't think a man can define you," Simpson told "You have to own that."

Simpson, who hosts VH1 reality show The Price of Beauty, also said: "So, if you're ever with anyone who says you should change something about yourself, then they should never fall in love with you in the first place."

Not that Simpson still isn't hopeful about finding the right guy. "[In] 10 years I would love to be a mom, I would love just to be in love and be a mom," she said. "It sounds simple, but it's a lot harder [than you think]. I'm pretty picky."

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