08/02/2010 at 01:00 AM EDT
Speculation about who (if anyone) gets the final rose is at a fever pitch ahead of Monday's finale of The Bachelorette
. But the person who is most excited for the season to be over is the leading lady herself, Ali Fedotowsky
"I cannot wait for the show to be over. I want to get back to my life and I just want the truth out there," she told PEOPLE after taping the Men Tell All special
. "This is the hard part. You're on hold. Each week, you have to relive the good, the bad and the ugly."
And that includes her heartbreaking trip to Tahiti
, where Frank Neuschaefer
, a front-runner in many 's minds, eliminated himself in order to go return to the arms of his ex. "Talking to Frank in Tahiti was awful and painful, but ultimately I’m glad he realized his feelings and bowed out before I had to make my final decision,” Ali says. “It was a difficult journey and so hard at times, but I also had some really great once-in-a-lifetime experiences. High highs and low lows and all that. Through both, I learned a lot about myself.”
Frank left her with two "amazing guys with big hearts" at the end – and Ali told PEOPLE what she sees in both Chris Lambton and Roberto Martinez
"Chris is so funny and has such a huge heart. Everything with his family is appealing to me. I love that they love each other so strongly and openly and that he went home to be with his mom and dad when his mom was sick," she says. "Roberto is loyal and thoughtful. One example is when we were talking ... about past relationships and his ex-girlfriend. He paused and said, 'I don’t feel comfortable talking about her in front of the cameras because I don't want this to hurt her.' Even though they're broken up, he had respect for her. That kind of integrity is amazing to me."
Now that the waiting game is almost over, Ali doesn't regret participating in the televised quest for love, despite finishing filming with a fuller figure. "I'm happy I did the show, although I could have been a little more healthy while doing it," she says. "I could barely get into my jeans when I returned."
How did she end up gaining weight on the show? "I basically ticked the checklist of everything you should do to gain weight – overeating, unhealthy eating, drinking, no sleep, no exercise, high stress. And supposedly you gain weight when you're happy," says Fedotowsky, whose body went back to normal when she returned to her normal routine. "I couldn't be in the better place right now. In fact, I think I'm in the best place that I have ever been in my life." --Carrie BellTell us: Who will Ali pick on tonight's finale of The Bachelorette?