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Claire and Phil decided to break from their 17-year tradition -- family-style food and cannolis at Fratelli's -- and meet up instead at a hotel for some risqué role-play. Their innuendo-filled conversation (and Claire's act of handing Phil her dress and lingerie in the hotel bar after changing into a trench coat) gets their engines revving, but the mood goes from sexy to sour after her coat gets stuck in a moving escalator -- and multiple passersby try to step in and help.
Meanwhile, Mitchell is bummed after he's unable to give his stellar closing statement at a trial he's been working on for months. So, he and Cameron plan a quiet night in, but after Manny arrives for a sleepover feeling lovesick about his grade-school crush, they set out to track her down. Arriving at the local Great Shakes diner, they hilariously attempt to intervene as she enjoys a date with the class bully.
Finally, Jay and Gloria spend their Valentine's Day at comedian David Brenner's stand-up show. Though Gloria was skeptical of the plan at first -- her definition of "funny" doesn't quite match Jay's -- she ends up loving the routine. But the problem is that Brenner decides to go off about Jay's age, which hits him right where it hurts. Luckily Gloria saves the day, reassuring Jay that her love doesn't have an expiration date.
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