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Bachelorette Recap: Jillian Makes Some Shocking Picks

ABC
Vancouver, Canada-based restaurant designer Jillian Harris, 29, began her onscreen journey to find love from a pool of 30 eligible gentlemen callers on the premiere episode of The Bachelorette. And though it's too soon to tell which guy has what it takes to make it to the end, many fought hard -- to good (a dance-off!) and bad (drawing finger mustaches) effect -- for Jillian's attention.
Welcome Back, Jillian: There was a quick summary of her season spent wooing Jason Mesnick and the producers, of course, found a way to work in a bit of her soft-core spa date. There was the sullen alone time looking out over the water to represent her heartbreak and a cheesy shoe shopping montage, packing of a stuffed animal and obligatory exercise routine to prove she’s ready to get back on the dating-show horse. What we appreciated the most? Her subtle dig at Jason: “I’m going to find Mr. Right, but I’m going to make the right decision the first time.”
Reality Trend Watch: Too bad Survivor’s Coach has a lady friend because Jillian also fancies herself a dragon slayer.
Future Celebrity Baby Name: Kiptyn Celebrity Look-alikes: When Juan tilts his head, he looks like an Argentinean David Arquette. Adam did a mean Thom Yorke of Radiohead, Jesse reminded us of Justin Chambers and Ed had gave off a Jeffrey Dean Morgan vibe.
Score Tactics: Some of these guys never stood a chance against foolproof woo methods like a sexy foreign accent (Simon), a guitar and a velvet voice (Wes the Rooster), a memorable gift (Jake and his wings), a standout accessory (Mathue and his autographed cowboy hat) or a stiff drink (Jesse and Robby both could make one). There were also some things that make the what-not-to-do list like comment about the weather (Josh) or challenge a professional dancer to a battle. (Think night one dance-off was a series’ first and every second of it was amazing. And now that we’re thinking about it, there were many reasons why Billbro just had to go like his black undies, lame nickname and using the same weak Entourage reference twice in less than five minutes.) Some things are hit and miss like sweeping her off her feet. It worked for Mathue but not for Bryan.
Shocking Picks: When Brad dusted off his shoulders theatrically, all we pictured was dandruff. Brian seems abrasive, quick-tempered, narcissistic, obsessed with being a hick and kept calling her bad nicknames like Hot Tub Harris and Sexy Minx. Mike used a lame pickup line which started with throwing a baseball and ended with him, one of the extra five men added to the competition halfway through the night, saying, “You are a great catch.” Julien seemed like a tool who drove around in a Ferrari and jumped out of planes to compensate for something.
Surprise Dismissals: John H. seemed like a keeper with his pro-feminist outlook and gentle spirit although he already seemed convinced she was his soul mate. Everybody likes the goofy, witty underdog except apparently Jillian, which is why Stephen and Kyle didn’t make it. Kyle, we thought you had her at the mustache tattoo. Maybe socks would have helped
Early Front-Runners: David was all teeth and nerves in the driveway, but redeemed himself and left with the first impression rose. We think Serbian Sasha, Wes, Juan (although he could turn out to be huge mama’s boy), Kiptyn, Ed, Tanner P. (although his foot fetish bordered on obsessive, and we’re pretty darn sure Jillian will get creeped out when she sees the playback of his ode to high arches) and Jake (He should take the aviation talk down a notch.).
Potent Quotables: “Maybe she doesn’t like awesome guys” (Stephen); “I look good. I smell good. I make love good” (Kyle); “There’s a huge part of me that is very much a one-woman man” (Michael). --Carrie Bell
Tell us: Was there anyone you would have like to see stay longer or go home that didn’t? Who is your pick for front-runner? And what was your favorite moment of the premiere?
MORE: Bachelorette Blog: Jillian Overwhelmed By a Whopping 30 Guys!ABC
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