Bethenny Frankel is no ice queen.
The reality star hit the rink for the live premiere of ABC's Skating with the Stars Monday night and heard some very mixed reviews from the judges.
"[It was] vaguely reminiscent of childbirth," a dizzy Frankel said after her spin-heavy performance with partner Ethan Burgess.
"You look spectacular. You have the perfect figure for skating. You are one skinny babe," judge Dick Button told Frankel. "But I hope you can be a little less static with the flow of your skating. I get the impression that you're kind of walking on eggshells."
Johnny Weir repeated the compliment about Frankel's physique. "Your body is sick. It's perfect for skating," he said. "I cannot believe you just had a baby."
But the judge had concerns about Frankel's level of commitment. "The one thing you really need to remember, it is skating," Weir said. "You need to be in it or stay on the side. You have to really give it your all. I don't want to see another part time project. I want you to really get into it ... Skating has to come first."
Frankel and Burgess received 15 out of 30 points for their technical merit and just 14 out of 30 for their artistic impression, giving them a total of just 29 out of 60 for the night. The only other pair to do worse was rocker Vince Neil and Jennifer Wester, who earned 28 points for the night.
"That means we suck and we have to be better next week," Frankel said. But "I'm here. I'm so happy. I'm having the best time. It's such a great experience."
Soap star Rebecca Budig and Fred Palascak were at the top of the leaderboard with 45 points, followed by skiing great Jonny Moseley and Brooke Castile with 40.
Disney Channel star Brandon Mychal Smith and Keauna McLaughlin, who earned 36 points and actress Sean Young and Denis Petukhov, who earned 34 points, landed in the middle.