Nicole Kidman 'Desperately' Wanted Another Child
updated 02/21/2011 AT 12:00 PM EST
•originally published 02/20/2011 AT 06:15 PM EST
The mother of four, who just welcomed baby Faith on Dec. 28 via a gestational carrier, says she has "had a roller coaster ride with fertility."
"Anyone that's been in the place of wanting another child or wanting a child knows the disappointment, the pain and the loss that you go through trying and struggling with fertility," the Rabbit Hole actress, 43, tells Australia's 60 Minutes in an interview set to air Sunday night. "Fertility is such a big thing, and it's not something I've ever run away from talking about."
It's a struggle that dates back to her marriage with Tom Cruise – whom she divorced in 2001 after adopting kids Isabella, 18, and Connor, 16. In 2007, the actress revealed she had a miscarriage before they split.
After giving birth to daughter Sunday Rose, now 2½, her first child with husband Keith Urban, Kidman says the couple used a surrogate because of her fertility struggles.
"We were in a place of desperately wanting another child," she says. "This opportunity arose for us, and I couldn't get pregnant."
Now as the family settles down in their homes in Nashville and Los Angeles, Kidman says she enjoys time with all of her kids equally.
"Children are children – you'll die for your children," she says. "And when you feel that as a parent – that's the unconditional love."