Chad Ochocinco & Evelyn Lozada Not Rushing to the Altar
03/20/2011 AT 09:50 AM EDT
"He has four kids. I have one. We want to be engaged for at least a year and enjoy our time with our children, and then we're going to plan our wedding," Lozada told PEOPLE at Cosmopolitan's Fun Fearless Males of 2011 party in New York, where Ochocinco was honored.
And when they do start planning, they'll have to compromise on some things. "I want something small, even though he wants something big," Lozada says. "I want something intimate. I'm 35, and we have five kids together. I don't want anything over the top."
The pair are in better agreement on the topic of kids – they both want more. In fact, Lozada says they would love to have twins. "The more kids, the happier I am," she says.
Ochocinco, 33 – the Cincinnati Bengals player and former contestant on Dancing with the Stars – says his relationship with Lozada works so well because they don't hide anything from each other.
"I know everything about her, so there are no surprises," he says. "My grandma says, 'Always marry your best friend, because your best friend will be able to tell you anything and not hide nothing.' That's one of the things I really like, which is one of the reasons why she's wearing that ring."
And they really do share everything – including the specifics of their former love affairs. "Sometimes we sit back at night and we literally sit for three to four hours and share stories about who we've dated and what we've done ... every detail," says Lozada.
Adds Ochocinco: "I'm nosy. I want to know who you've been with."
The couple have also grown closer through adversity, after Lozada – the ex-fiancée of former NBA player Antoine Walker – was attacked on her VH1 reality show Basketball Wives after revealing she had slept with a castmate's ex-husband. She said Ochocinco helped her get through the episode.
"I was having a hard time [watching]," she says. "I have a lot of followers on Twitter, so everyone has an opinion on your life, and they think they know you. Some of the things they say are hurtful, but he made me keep it together. He's very supportive with everything."