Real Housewives of New York City: Who's an Alcoholic?
08/02/2011 AT 09:10 AM EDT
"The damage is done," Jill Zarin told PEOPLE at Saturday's Bridgehampton Polo match. "I don't know if I can film with these girls."
In town to spend "low-key" time with her family, Jill spoke about her feud with costar Ramona Singer and the allegations of alcoholism among the women.
"During the reunion, [Ramona was] hitting below the belt. I tried to be a friend to Ramona. And I thought that she was acting a little bit erratic, more so than before. I was trying to help her and point it out," JIll said.
"A lot of times people who have problems don't see it themselves. That's why there are interventions ... I really wanted to try to help her. And instead she tried to turn it around on me."
When the topic of alcohol – particularly, Ramona's Pinot Grigio – came up at the reunion, Ramona responded to Jill's accusation that her drinking sets a bad example.
"Jill, I really respect you. I think you're a fabulous woman," said Ramona. "I know at times you had problems. You went to AA. You had an alcoholic problem. Just because you did doesn't mean I do."
Jill, who denied she ever had a drinking problem, believes outing someone about going to Alcoholics Anonymous is unacceptable. "Whether it is true or not, is irrelevant," says Jill, who claims she received a letter from a woman who's been trying to get her daughter to seek help for addiction.
"The mother tells me the daughter is scared to go in the program because she's worried that a friend of hers might out her," Jill says. "It's destructive to people and the damage that [Ramona] caused is going to prevent people from getting help."
In fact, according to Jill, Ramona should apologize. "She should really retract that," she says, "and try to figure out how to go back out there and say, 'I'm sorry.' "