Debra Messing Splits from Daniel Zelman
12/20/2011 AT 03:30 PM EST
The pair, who are parents to 7½-year-old son Roman, "privately separated earlier this year after a 10 year marriage," Messing's rep confirms to PEOPLE.
"The decision was mutual, and they remain supportive of one another and committed to raising their son as a family."
Messing, 43, first met Zelman – now an actor and producer – when they were both students at New York University (and then dated for eight years).
She told PEOPLE in 2004, "I want my child to be like my husband. He is sensitive, really intelligent, really funny ... but solid. He has a good sense of perspective."
The Emmy-winning Will & Grace actress will next star in NBC's new musical drama Smash.
Reporting by JULIE JORDAN