I hadn't seen any of the guys since I sent them home, so I was beyond nervous! The hardest to see was definitely Sean, because I didn't feel like we had much closure, and it was really important to me that he knew that everything I felt was 100 percent real for me.
I am so happy that Sean is in a great place now and looks back on our time together fondly. I feel the same.
I was hoping Ryan would watch the show and realize that if almost every guy in the house thinks you're arrogant, you should probably do some self-reflecting and make some changes. However, the only thing that has changed about Ryan is his hair, which looks much better in my opinion. He still stands behind everything he said and did on the show, which, to be honest, doesn't surprise me much.
Gratitude Toward DougDoug and I had an awkward goodbye to say the least, so it was good to see him in a different setting. I'm happy I could let him know how much I regretted not giving him the group date rose in London and how grateful I was for everything he did. It really meant a lot to me that Doug, and so many of the other guys, stood up for me at the Men Tell All taping, and I know I'll count many of them as friends forever.
I had been waiting for an apology from Kalon for a while and had he come to me anytime, I absolutely would've accepted it. Who knows, maybe we could've been friends! But just days before the Men Tell All some people forwarded me a picture he posted on the Internet of a baggage claim and how he thought he'd see me there. His next post said, "Sorry I'm not sorry."
He made it pretty clear he wasn't sorry, so I wasn't going to sit there and let him think he was tricking me into thinking he was a nice guy. People like Kalon make me sad and I'm just glad I never have to waste another second thinking about him!
I can't believe how fast this season has gone and there are only a few more days until the finale! I can't say thank you enough to all of you that have been so kind to me the past couple of weeks and have supported me.
Be sure to tune in on Sunday for, by far, the best episode yet!