Brooke Shields Sports Mullet & Ink for The Middle
10/18/2012 AT 03:30 PM EDT
How about garish swimsuit, a mullet haircut, ink, belly-button ring, an unseasonable tan and an antagonistic attitude.
Brooke Shields, playing trashy neighbor Rita Glossner, had them all in spades – not to mention that at 5'11" she towers over the ABC sitcom's leading lady, Patricia Heaton – on Wednesday night's episode of The Middle.
Rita, convinced that Frankie Heck (Heaton) has stolen the Glossner garden hose, promises to rain fire down on the Heck household. In the reign of terror that ensues, Frankie even chips a tooth, though it is all her own fault.
Still, the real shocker is how the beautiful Shields, 47, managed to turn herself into a horrific harridan. Goes to show what just a few body adornments will do. Mullet, anyone?