Ready for Love's Ernesto and Ben Confront the Weirdness of Dating on TV

04/23/2013 at 07:30 PM EDT

You can watch all the dating shows you want. But once you're a contestant, suddenly it's real – sometimes painfully so.

Ernesto Arguello and Ben Patton have been learning that the hard way on Ready for Love, with both guys finding it particularly difficult to say goodbye to the women.

"It is more stressful going to that garden than anything else," Arguello, 34, tells PEOPLE.

"The garden is unreal," adds Patton. "You're essentially breaking up with someone. You're not just saying, 'Hey, here's a rose for you. And you guys didn't get a rose,' and walk off."

Another challenging aspect of the show? Watching yourself on TV – particularly the kissing scenes!

"It's like hearing your own voice on voicemail," says Patton. "And it's even more uncomfortable when you see yourself and a girl, and you're thinking, 'Everyone's watching this at home!'"

But the guys agree it's worth it in the end. Without revealing details – after all, the guys continue their journey on Tuesday night's episode at 9/8c on NBC – Arguello and Patton both admit their experience has a happy ending.

Patton, 32, says he's been with the same person since filming ended. And Arguello adds: "I did find love, and I am very happy."

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