Bethenny Frankel Surprised Divorce Is Not Amicable

Bethenny Frankel Divorcing Jason Hoppy - She's Surprised It's Not Amicable
Bethenny Frankel and Jason Hoppy
Jackson Lee/Splash News Online

updated 05/01/2013 AT 08:00 AM EDT

originally published 04/30/2013 AT 07:15 PM EDT

While Bethenny Frankel and Jason Hoppy aren't scheduled to return to divorce court for a few more weeks, the reality-star-turned-talk-show-host has been giving a lot of thought to how far apart she and her ex have drifted.

At the time of the split, Frankel released a statement in which she said that she and Hoppy hoped to "amicably co-parent" their daughter Bryn, who turns 3 next month.

Now, in an exclusive interview with PEOPLE, Frankel says she can see that's going to be a challenge.

"I really did think it would be amicable. I absolutely did," she says. "I wrote that entire statement myself. And every single word, I believed to be true."

Now, faced with divorce negotiations that continue to drag on – while Hoppy continues to wear his wedding ring – Frankel is left to wonder how she could have been so off the mark.

"Someone said to me recently, 'We see what we want to see.' And I guess, at the time, that's what I did," she says.

Still, the Skinnygirl guru hasn't stopped looking for the positive.

"The truth of the matter is, you go with your gut at the time," she says. "Whatever I'm going through now, I'm certain that I'll learn something from it. When the clouds pass, I will figure out what the silver lining was."

Look for more of PEOPLE's exclusive interview with Frankel about her divorce, her daughter, and dating life, in an upcoming issue
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