Katy Perry and Kristen Stewart
07/30/2013 at 11:00 AM EDT
After Katy Perry
and Robert Pattinson showed up at a wedding rehearsal in May
, rumors swirled about the nature of their relationship.
But the singer says she was just being a friend and even texted Pattinson's ex, Kristen Stewart
, to make that clear.
"I sent her a text message saying: 'I know you've seen all this stuff but you know I would never disrespect you. I'm not that person,' " she explains in the September issue of ELLE UK
. "'I'm just trying to be a friend to him but it is unfortunate that I do have a set of t––s.' "
While she's just a pal to Pattinson, the 28-year-old admits that when it comes to love, she goes for "challenging" men.
"The men I have gone for are challenging, yes, but they're also wildly intelligent and poetic," she says. "I'm not interested in taming anyone – I'm pretty wild myself."
But while her on-again, off-again romance with John Mayer
is currently on
, she adds that she learned from their split last February
"He pulled away. That was a big hello for me. I realized I could lose the person I loved and I had to deal with some things, issues I think a lot of women have," she explains. "You can be strong in one aspect of your life but submissive in another. In relationships, it was hard for me to speak up and set boundaries. I think that a lot of that has to do with the fear of loss."