PEOPLE's Semi-Official Guide to Kissing Your Award on Oscar Night

Oscars 2014: See Photos of Winners Kissing Their Oscar Trophies
Audrey Hepburn at the 1954 Oscars (left) and Anne Hathaway at the 2013 Oscars
Getty; Wireimage

updated 02/21/2014 at 03:00 PM EST

originally published 02/25/2014 08:20AM

Of all the awards shows this season, the Oscars provide the best opportunity for the winners to whip out a classic trophy kiss. The Emmy is too spiky and the Golden Globe makes you look megalomaniacal, but the Oscar statue is just right – a friendly little man made entirely out of gold. Who wouldn't want to kiss him?

But not all Oscar kisses are created equally.

Just as kissing a human requires a hundred instant mental calculations – Cheek or lips? How much tongue? – so does kissing an Oscar. Below, a look at some of the ways Oscar winners have chosen to smooch their statue at their moment of triumph.

Our story begins with Audrey Hepburn, one of the first Hollywood stars to kiss her award in public. (Many previous winners undoubtedly enjoyed one or two moments of passion with the trophy in the privacy of their own homes.) Here, Hepburn shows off the easiest form of the trophy kiss, holding the trophy face-out while she plants a demure smooch on the back of its head.



PEOPLE's Semi-Official Guide to Kissing Your Award on Oscar Night| Oscars 2014, Angelina Jolie, Anne Hathaway, Audrey Hepburn, Benicio Del Toro, Bob Hope, Jamie Foxx, Javier Bardem, Jean Dujardin, Lionel Richie, Penelope Cruz

Audrey Hepburn at the 1954 Oscars, with actor Jean Hersholt (for whom the Academy's humanitarian award was named)

John Peodincuk / NY Daily News / Getty


Years later, Angelina Jolie would show off the modern version of the pose.

PEOPLE's Semi-Official Guide to Kissing Your Award on Oscar Night| Oscars 2014, Angelina Jolie, Anne Hathaway, Audrey Hepburn, Benicio Del Toro, Bob Hope, Jamie Foxx, Javier Bardem, Jean Dujardin, Lionel Richie, Penelope Cruz

Angelina Jolie at the 2000 Oscars

Scott Nelson / AFP / Getty


A more popular variant is the cheek-kiss, used when you'd rather treat your Oscar like a close friend than a baby.

PEOPLE's Semi-Official Guide to Kissing Your Award on Oscar Night| Oscars 2014, Angelina Jolie, Anne Hathaway, Audrey Hepburn, Benicio Del Toro, Bob Hope, Jamie Foxx, Javier Bardem, Jean Dujardin, Lionel Richie, Penelope Cruz

Bob Hope at the 1953 Oscars

Joe Rustan / AFP / Getty

PEOPLE's Semi-Official Guide to Kissing Your Award on Oscar Night| Oscars 2014, Angelina Jolie, Anne Hathaway, Audrey Hepburn, Benicio Del Toro, Bob Hope, Jamie Foxx, Javier Bardem, Jean Dujardin, Lionel Richie, Penelope Cruz

Jamie Foxx at the 2005 Oscars

J. Vespa / WireImage

PEOPLE's Semi-Official Guide to Kissing Your Award on Oscar Night| Oscars 2014, Angelina Jolie, Anne Hathaway, Audrey Hepburn, Benicio Del Toro, Bob Hope, Jamie Foxx, Javier Bardem, Jean Dujardin, Lionel Richie, Penelope Cruz

Anne Hathaway at the 2013 Oscars

Steve Granitz / WireImage


It doesn't always work, though, as the angle makes for some amusing miscues.



PEOPLE's Semi-Official Guide to Kissing Your Award on Oscar Night| Oscars 2014, Angelina Jolie, Anne Hathaway, Audrey Hepburn, Benicio Del Toro, Bob Hope, Jamie Foxx, Javier Bardem, Jean Dujardin, Lionel Richie, Penelope Cruz

Benicio Del Toro at the 2001 Oscars

Kevin Winter / Getty

PEOPLE's Semi-Official Guide to Kissing Your Award on Oscar Night| Oscars 2014, Angelina Jolie, Anne Hathaway, Audrey Hepburn, Benicio Del Toro, Bob Hope, Jamie Foxx, Javier Bardem, Jean Dujardin, Lionel Richie, Penelope Cruz

Jean Dujardin at the 2012 Oscars

Joe Klamar / AFP / Getty

PEOPLE's Semi-Official Guide to Kissing Your Award on Oscar Night| Oscars 2014, Angelina Jolie, Anne Hathaway, Audrey Hepburn, Benicio Del Toro, Bob Hope, Jamie Foxx, Javier Bardem, Jean Dujardin, Lionel Richie, Penelope Cruz

Lionel Richie at the 1986 Oscars

Getty


It's a rare star who can actually manage to kiss their Oscar plumb on the lips, but Penélope Cruz managed it perfectly.

PEOPLE's Semi-Official Guide to Kissing Your Award on Oscar Night| Oscars 2014, Angelina Jolie, Anne Hathaway, Audrey Hepburn, Benicio Del Toro, Bob Hope, Jamie Foxx, Javier Bardem, Jean Dujardin, Lionel Richie, Penelope Cruz

Penélope Cruz at the 2009 Oscars

Mark Ralston / AFP / Getty


Her husband, Javier Bardem, though, performed a slightly more risqué act upon his own trophy. We've saved it for last, in case there were any children reading.

PEOPLE's Semi-Official Guide to Kissing Your Award on Oscar Night| Oscars 2014, Angelina Jolie, Anne Hathaway, Audrey Hepburn, Benicio Del Toro, Bob Hope, Jamie Foxx, Javier Bardem, Jean Dujardin, Lionel Richie, Penelope Cruz

Javier Bardem at the 2008 Oscars

Steve Granitz / WireImage

Javier! You're bad!

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