Your Weekly Horoscope: Warm and Fuzzy Butterflies or True Detective-esque Weirdness?

03/03/2014 at 06:00 AM EST

Horoscope: Your zodiac signs and astrology reading revealed March 2014
PEOPLE.com Illustration By Debra Cartwright

Eva Mendes

Eva Mendes

Pisces

Pisces (Feb. 19 – Mar. 20)

When the leaves turn colors and crunch under your feet this fall, what do you imagine will be different in your life? The new moon has kick-started a new six-month cycle for you – set your plan in motion now to reap the rewards during sweater weather.

Aries

Aries (Mar. 21 – Apr. 19)

Mars is all up in your relationship's face, but that doesn't mean you're destined for Splitsville like Paula Patton and Robin Thicke. Single Aries, be patient. Commitment-phobes, be fair and make a choice. Two peas in a tight pod may need some breathing room.

Taurus

Taurus (Apr. 20 – May 20)

You're seeking the Marty Hart to your Rust Cohle (but with way, way fewer trust issues). With Saturn parked in your seventh house, the stage is set for a great partnership in business or life – just be sure to screen for signs of deep weirdness, detective.

Gemini

Gemini (May 21 – Jun. 21)

Woohoo, you've got a few extra bucks in your pocket! Now, don't blow it all on a diamond grill or Japanese selvedge jeans. Hold on tightly until this weekend, when Jupiter goes direct and new (financially responsible) opportunities abound.

Cancer

Cancer (Jun. 22 – Jul. 22)

You've been on a wild roller coaster, Cancer, and you left your Dramamine in your other purse. Thankfully, lovey-dovey Venus in Aquarius on Wednesday makes everything more copacetic. Once you don't need to white-knuckle it, lean back and enjoy the ride.

Leo

Leo (Jul. 23 – Aug. 22)

Where did you get those rose-colored glasses, Leo? Looking upon the object of your affection, you're all warm fuzzies and butterflies – but will the feeling remain when the sunnies come off? Get in touch with your intuition and listen to your heart.

Virgo

Virgo (Aug. 23 – Sep. 22)

You've been working behind the scenes for a long time. Have you lost hope in ever finishing your project? The Pisces new moon brought with it a whoosh of teamwork mojo. Keep at it, and you'll be ready to strut your stuff by spring.

Libra

Libra (Sep. 23 – Oct. 23)

With your cash flow turning into a sputter, the time has come to take an interest in your achy breaky bank account. Saturn in retrograde gives you extra time to work out the best strategy for saving. Take this opportunity to learn the lessons presented to you.

Scorpio

Scorpio (Oct. 24 – Nov. 21)

Congratulations on winning the Oscar for Mopiest Sun Sign this week, Scorpio. Lift your spirits with some pampering – a deep tissue massage or a glass of single-malt Scotch should do the trick. You'll be back to your sassy self in no time.

Sagittarius

Sagittarius (Nov. 22 – Dec. 21)

With Jupiter in retrograde, you feel like you're being pulled in a thousand directions and getting nothing accomplished (besides creating more stress). Slow your pace. You'll see that there's enough time to get everything done without breaking a sweat.

Capricorn

Capricorn (Dec. 22 – Jan. 19)

A certain situation has run its course, so you'd be wise to start planning your great escape. Make sure to get all your affairs in order first, though. Don't leave people behind with a mess – just an elegant view of your backside, Pippa Middleton style.

Aquarius

Aquarius (Jan. 20 – Feb. 18)

Staying motivated right now seems totally impossible, but with the right support – a gym buddy, cool-headed colleague, or generous benefactor – you can achieve anything. And Aquarius, don't forget to smile. (Tip: Imagine a corgi holding a cupcake.)

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