Life has been hell for Trevor Rees-Jones, the sole survivor of the 1997 crash that killed Princess Diana, Dodi Fayed and driver Henri Paul. He tells PEOPLE in the new issue: "A couple of times I felt if I had died, instead of them, it would have been much easier both for me personally and for everybody else." In his new book, "The Bodyguard's Story," which appears in an exclusive excerpt in PEOPLE, Rees-Jones, 32, details the nature of the Diana-Dodi relationship -- which may not have been as romantic as Dodi's father, Harrods department store owner Mohamed Al Fayed, maintains. Rees-Jones disputes Al Fayed's claim that his son and Diana picked out an engagement ring in Monte Carlo. He also says in the book that Al Fayed's aides arranged for him to speak to a London tabloid, so Rees-Jones could say he'd heard Diana crying out for Dodi after the crash. In the book he now admits that he only recalled hearing the word "Dodi" later in a dream.
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