And so, Lauper came to the realization that sooner or later hits every working mother who has passed up a plum job to be with her child: You can't have it all (or, at least, not all at the same time). In a world where performers target the glow of stardom with the determination of heat-seeking missiles, an increasingly long list of the biggest names in showbiz -- including Celine Dion, Demi Moore, Annette Bening and Jodie Foster -- no longer want to. In the enviable financial position to be able to Just Say No, some celebs, such as former MTV whiz kid Tabitha Soren, give up working altogether. Others, including Sissy Spacek -- who took a break from life on her Virginia farm to film her Oscar-nominated turn in In the Bedroom -- just slow down. Whatever the logistics, though, the logic is the same.
"At the end of the day it's about women wanting balance," says producer Lynda Obst, who got Bening to star in 1998's The Siege with offers of on-set daycare and a special play trailer for her kids. "What it feels like is, 'I'm not going on 100 percent psycho-drive just to get work, work, work. I'm only going to do the stuff that has value because I love my family and I'm just as happy staying home as working.' "
Happier, even. Single mom and Panic Room star Foster, 39, recently closed down Egg Pictures, her 12-year-old production company, and tries to limit herself to acting in one film every two years. As she told Premiere in March of her desire to spend time with sons Charles, 3, and Kit, 6 months, "Raising them is so much more interesting than anything else I do."