– Mindhunters' LL Cool J, on being what he calls the first black man to survive a thriller (in Deep Blue Sea)
"I'm a workhorse. I love working. And I'll miss my family – my TV family was a real family."
– Kelsey Grammer, on what he'll miss most about Frasier, which is ending its 11-year run
"I don't like the idea of somebody farting in my meringue."
– Van Helsing's Kate Beckinsale, on why she doesn't send food back in restaurants
"I just want the money and the fame and the adoration, and I don't want any of the other stuff."
– Matthew Broderick, to W magazine, on the price of celebrity
"I don't even RSVP. If there was a box that said 'As if,' I would check that."
– Margaret Cho, on declining a White House invite
"I'm gonna miss the Friends. I mean, because we used to watch them once a week, and now, we're only gonna get to see them every day at 3, 5, 7 and 9 ... right after Golden Girls, Seinfeld and Law & Order."
– Ellen DeGeneres
"Things seem funnier when you're really, really tired."
– Late Show with David Letterman's executive producer, Rob Burnett, on why they will tape an episode with a live audience at 4 a.m.
"If I was her age and if I was blonde and pretty like her, I would be worse! I wouldn't smoke one cigarette, I'd smoke two – and a cigar! And I wouldn't have one man, I'd have every man!"
– Sharon Osbourne, weighing in on tabloid reports of Britney Spears's wild behavior
"Perhaps the senator saw my movie Gigli last fall and figured I'd be working for minimum wage myself."
– Ben Affleck, backing an increase in the federal hourly minimum wage proposed by Massachusetts Sen. Edward Kennedy