Eva's Life As a Desperate Housewife
Why is it that with the election expected to be so close, some people still don't vote? We posed the question to Cher at a recent MoveOn Student Action event at South Beach hotspot Crobar, and the outspoken star didn't disappoint. "Because they're lazy," she told us of the non-voters. "There is some country where you must vote or you get a ticket. That's the way it should be in America. You should have to vote. It's the least you can do. Get up off your fat ass, put down your GameBoy or your Xbox, put down your telephone, get away from the computer and get your ass up and go do what is your responsibility and your right."
We asked Rescue Me star, writer and producer Denis Leary for his quick takes on a few hot topics.
Ashlee Simpson's SNL lip-synch glitch: "That acid reflux disease can be a bitch, it really can."
Prince Harry's paparazzi scuffle: "I think if you're a prince you should be able to beat the crap out of the paparazzi and throw some money at them. You're a prince! What are they going to do to you? Believe me, if I was a prince or if I was the king of a country, I'd be beating up paparazzi people all the time. I'd be taking 'em out and having 'em whipped. That's why they don't make people like me prince."
Jay-Z's own brand of cognac: "If we're doing that, all of us should have our own drinks then. I could have my own brand of whiskey; he could have his own cognac. Everybody can have whatever they drink and have their name on it."
Martha Stewart's reality show with Survivor/Apprentice creator Mark Burnett: "Are they doing it while she's in prison? That's the show I would watch. I'm not a big reality show fan, but if they were going to do a Martha Stewart in jail show – I'm telling you, the ratings would go through the roof. I'd watch it every week. I'd actually play a guest-starring role, I'd come in to visit her."
Hilary Duff vs. Lindsay Lohan: "Oh my God, I got money on it. A lot of people thought (the winner) would be Lindsay Lohan – but I knew she was gonna get sick. She's been sick – she's been in the hospital because she's scared of Hilary Duff. She's hiding out. My money's on Hilary. She's tough."
Britney Spears becomes Britney Federline: "Good luck to that guy. I want to see how long she chills out for. It'll last about two weeks, and then she's back on tour and I think he's gone."
Next up for the funnyman: His Leary Firefighters Foundation's Fourth Annual Bash for New York's Bravest on Nov. 8 at New York club Capitale.
Caught in the Act
Danny Masterson (That '70s Show), Dominic Monaghan (Lost) and Joey Slotnick (Nip/Tuck), separately, at Sunday matinees at L.A.'s ArcLight Cinemas.
Chris Klein, shopping with a pal at Pavilions grocery store on L.A.'s Melrose Avenue.
Actress Patricia Clarkson (Pieces of April), hosting the Grand Classic screening of the 1944 Ingrid Bergman film Gaslight at New York's Soho House. In the audience: a mustachioed Chris Noth, plus Shall We Dance? actor (and Clarkson's Station Agent costar) Bobby Cannavale and his girlfriend Annabella Sciorra.
American Idol's Randy Jackson, at a Zink magazine party in L.A., watching a performance by Cirque du Soleil's Zumanity cast.
Stevie Wonder, at New York club Marquee with six pals.
By DANA MELTZER, JON WARECH, MOLLY LOPEZ, BRENDA RODRIGUEZ, JOANNE FOWLER, MARISA LAUDADIO and CARYN MIDLER