06:09 PM EDT 01/23/2014

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Credit: James Dittiger/Lifetime
REVIEW: Lifetime's Flowers In the Attic Is Crazy Good | Lifetime, Flowers in the Attic, V.C. Andrews

PEOPLE's TV Critic: Lifetime's Flowers In the Attic Is Crazy Good

Originally posted 01/18/2014 12:35PM

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Flowers in the Attic is the rare Lifetime movie (it airs Saturday at 8 p.m. ET/PT) that can't simply be written off as a Lifetime movie. It's so pure and perverse an example of American Gothic, I felt compelled to read the original VC Andrews novel to try and comprehend what sort of imagination could hatch such a nutty story – a fairy tale, really, that somehow combines Hansel and Gretel and The Blue Lagoon. In Virginia horse country.

Flowers, both the book and the new movie, is completely absurd – if you want to gauge the absurdity, just know that one of the darkest secrets in the narrative involves a doughnut – but somehow also psychologically coherent. It has a grip.

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Credit: Chris Polk/Filmmagic
Lohan Pokes Fun at Jessica Simpson | Lindsay Lohan

Lohan Pokes Fun at Jessica Simpson

Originally posted 05/23/2005 10:00AM

MOCKED: On this weekend's Saturday Night Live, host Lindsay Lohan poked fun at Jessica Simpson in a skit lampooning Simpson's remaining chaste until she married Nick Lachey. With Will Forte playing Lachey, Lohan (as Simpson) quipped: "Remember a long time ago how we made out to 'Purple Rain,' when I did not lose my virginity?" Not that the Nick & Jessica were the evening's only target. Series regular Amy Poehler appeared in a puff of smoke as the ghost of Lohan's future and warned the Mean Girls actress: "Lindsay, your life is moving too fast! You gotta slow it down. I'm you. I've come from the future to tell you, you gotta cool it with the partying 'cause I'm totally beat!" In the current PEOPLE, Lohan, 18, attributes her slimmer figure to a new exercise routine. "I'm working out. I just got a trainer," she says. "Just old-school working out."

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