When it comes to star-crossed teenage love affairs – though to be literal, the immortal Edward (Robert Pattinson) is 104 but passes for 17 – this chaste duo didn't pick the easy road. She's human and he's a vampire. If that wasn't problematic enough, it turns out that her best bud and would-be beau, Jacob (Taylor Lautner), is a werewolf, the sworn enemy of vampires. What's a girl to do?
In Moon, based on the second novel in Stephenie Meyer's bestselling series, Bella (Kristen Stewart) seems almost pained as she listens to constant swoony protestations of undying love from both boys ("I just couldn't live in a world where you didn't exist!"). Though the battles between good and evil vampires and between vampires and wolves generate excitement, mostly Moon is a stilted, soapy supernatural romance.
You'd have to be an already ardent Twilight fan – girls and moms, you know who you are – to get moony over this teen twaddle.